._.

I will stay loyal to this blog. I WILL! While the idea of having a tumblr of my own is tempting, I know i'll eventually abandon this blog, and then eventually tumblr, like how I abandon everything else. I can't erase this blog though, it's chock full of memories.

I'll go hunting for some nice templates, then I'll work on restarting this blog again. Cheers!

We all have that fear sometimes. Do our parents really love us?

Homg.

How am I going to redesign the blog >_>; wtf I forgot how.

6 Nov.

I think the legs on that statue were carved beautifully.

Ignore the idiot trying to look up the statue's skirt.

Anyway, not in a very happy mood lately. When i'm unhappy I don't like to blog as much, cause it'll make me look like a whiney brat. Idc though, just have no idea what to talk about.

365 x 18...what do you get?

So i'm not officially 18 yet until it's around 6 pm, but who cares. I have ice cream cake + ice cream in the fridge :D I am a happy 18 year old.

Every birthday my mom would recall back the day she gave birth to me. She said on that day, she could just feel that I was about to come out. So she was like "Hmm, rasanya it's time to beranakkan Alisa". So she just got up and went to the clinic lol. Her doctor was all "hmm, okay we'll wait till she's ready" and sat down next to her and read the newspaper while both of them waited for me to decide to come out. Then suddenly...'plup' (actual sound effect from mom) I popped out :D

Mom also always noted that dad wasn't there in the room, cause he's scared of the blood. Dad always retorts by saying "bapak cool je hari tu".

So yeah, 18 years later and i'm still here. I'm blessed and fortunate to have lived a good life till today, and hopefully for many more years. What does being 18 mean though? ._. does it mean I can't get away with stuff anymore? Does it mean i'm legal to watch movies that i've actually already been watching? lolol. No not porn, all those 18+ movies with the gore/politics/secks/violence. ;0

I suppose 18 means that it's time to grow up. I kinda don't wanna, and I know no one's pressuring me to do so. So i'm gonna take it slow and easy, and grow up little by little, at my own pace. What's the point in rushing anyway, it's not like I can grow a moustache.

...maybe I can. HNGGGHHHHHHHH. *looks in mirror*

nah I can't.

I wanna thank my family for giving me the life I had, still have and am going to. My friends, everyone's that's been in my life at one point or another. You've all made me. All of you.

PS: Matriculation still sucks. Love you all!

Matriculation - 4 months.

I stand corrected. Matriculation is tough.

Don't get me wrong, the syllabus is pretty okay. As a physical science student (Jurusan Sains Fizikal) I only have to take Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics and English (with a few minor subjects; Kemahiran Dinamika, IT, Agama and also Co-Curriculum. But for the first semester I'm only learning KD and IT. I'll take the other 2 in my second semester).

I suppose the reason why I find it tough is because of the new lifestyle I have to live. I have to adjust to living in a dorm, being 2 hours away from friends, and not to mention Kedah's specialty >_> the week starts on Sunday-Thursday.

To give you a proper picture of what my life in matriculation has been like, lemme list down my daily schedule.

------------------------------------------------------
6:30 am - wake up. Shower, pray, get dressed.

7:45 am - Leave my room on the 3rd floor (whooooohooo 8 flights of stairs) to go to class.

8:00 am - Classes

12-1 pm - Break for lunch and prayers.

1-4 pm - Classes

4 pm onwards - freeeeeee. Unless if I have extra classes. Pretty rare though considering I have really nice lecturers. But after classes I usually settle anything I need like MIS, buy notes, sending in assignments or visit lecturers blah blah so I usually get back to the room around...

5 pm - prayers, homework, short nap : DDDDDDDDD

7 pm - shower, pray, dinner, moar homework, study

1/2 am (usually) - sleep.

*Lather, Rinse & Repeat.
------------------------------------------------------------

So yeah, while I don't ALWAYS have full classes from 8-4, maybe with one hour breaks in between, those are usually spent with homework, or nomnom time. As you can see, there isn't much fun included. What about weekends, you ask? Lolol. Well, at Kolej Matrikulasi Kedah, girls can only go for outings (as in, legally leave campus for a few hours) on Fridays. Boys on Saturdays. You can't wear jeans or normal clothes. Only attire allowed is either baju kurung, or the hideously over-size yellow/purple KMK shirt.

There aren't many places to go anyway. Since Kedah imo is already dull as it is, Changlun is like...man it's even more secluded than Kepala Batas. The nearest fast food restaurant is MARRYBROWN. But when you're desperate, Marrybrown is like heaven sent. I particularly like the Fish & Chips, cause for some reason the cafeteria for my dorm doesn't serve much fish. Desperado.

So basically the closest and cheapest place you can go to for supplies is C-mart (yes, Changlun-mart). RM1 per person by taxi to get there. Surprisingly it has a watson's store haha. There's like a supermarket in it, and then upstairs they sell clothes, computer stuff, even broadband. So you can pretty much get anything you need there. xD

When you leave or enter campus, you need to scan in your student card. Remember that MIS thing I mentioned earlier? It stands for Matriculation Information System. It's supposed to help them keep track of all the students but yeah it has it's flaws which I won't mention right now or else this post will double in length srsly I bet you're already getting tired of reading lolol.

So anyway, to go home, you need to apply for it first. Go to any of the computers on campus and fill in a form online. Check the next day if your application's been approved by one of the campus wardens. If it is, then you can go home. But ONLY after 4 pm, not one minute earlier. (lol apparently the MIS website can only be accessed through the comps on campus connected to their own private server to avoid being hacked. Total bull, you can access it anywhere). So yeah, you have to come back before 7 pm too, on any day. Scan in 1 minute later and your card will be blocked for 30 days. As in you won't be allowed to leave campus for 30 days. 30 DAAAAAYSSSS.

Oh and the guards suck too. They're so mean and irrational. 11 pm you have to be at your dorm. If they catch you anywhere on the ground, you'll get this annoying angry face from them, and they'll follow you around on their bikes while yelling at you. Another new wonderful rule from pengarah, is that strangers aren't allowed on campus, parents included. This means that if you wanna go home, you have to meet them at the front gate. You have to carry all your stuff from the dorm and walk over to the front gate. Parents aren't allowed to drive in and pick their kids up at the dorm. Trust me, it's not a short walk.

Food is quite okay. I spend about RM11 a day on food. Showers in our bathrooms don't have shower heads. So every morning shower is like a nice cold punch to the face to make you wake up. Main lights have to be turned off at midnight. If you wanna study, you're supposed to use the small study light provided. Thing is, the beds near the windows don't have any study lights, which is where my bed is. So when I first registered at the dorm, I told them I didn't have any study light (it was on this checklist thing we were given). They told me that I can bring my own. So I did. Haha guess what? A few weeks later we had a spot check, and one of the wardens wanted to confiscate my lamp because they said it wasn't allowed. wth man. I wasn't in the room atm though so they only took a pic of it as evidence.

meh, they never checked back to see if I got rid of it anyway.

So all of this + the fact that campus is haunted considering it's so close to Thailand, my life there is pretty stressed. Stressed from the fact that I know I have to do really well cause it's only 1 year and it's another chance for me to redeem myself. Stressed cause I can't be too stressed or else certain 'things' will come bother me ;_; Stressed cause I know I can't spend time with everyone, and when I come home on weekends I can only go out with people on Fridays, but everyone's busy. Stressed cause when I go home, I have to divide my time for everyone and everything but myself. So sometimes it's just better if I stay on campus.

Basically, I wanna apologize, guys. I know I haven't been able to come to all your parties, celebrate all your birthdays, or even talk as often as we used to. My mind's just set on really doing well this year, this short 12 months, and this might mean being separated from Penang, my old life and all it's wonders D: it sucks, really but I have no choice. If I don't spend my time thinking about homework I spend it on worrying about how this is affecting my relationships with people (family, friends, ...etc.)

I LOVE YOU ALL STILL K ILY

PS: lol finally an update after months. Long-ass post.

Fact is..

my blog is being spammed by chinese characters e_e I need to make it private. And I know I haven't even been updating but to keep it clean from spam >.> ...yeah, gotta do this.

Later, though. Super lazy.